Let's ROCK it!!!

I’ve got another post coming I am meaning to get around to, where think I might be putting the sourpuss away for a spell, but until I get around to this post, I thought I’d bring little miss positive out, for a squirt, and share another e-mail I sent to a friend.

Once again I am not going to share what friend, and what the circumstance are/where, because… Shit, we’ve been here. You get the drill. Anonymity is our friend for my friends. But, the meaning of this post is this: Sometimes I fall away, and my friends pick me up, sometimes it’s my turn to pick them up. Either way, friends, my friends, they are manna from above and we, you, ALL rock!!!

My friend...

It's true. You are beautiful to the bone. And, now, you are going to get the more present me, the friend who isn't complaining about her own life and I am going to tell you something...

You are not your actions. You are your core, your Being—the Source. The true you is part of the bigger connection. So, you are me, I am you, and we are everything. Yet, we are both human, too, and, this being human stuff, it means we are flawed and flawless. It is part of our design.

So you, we, are loving, learning, amazing human beings who are more than the love we give, the learning we do, or the mishaps or milestones we encounter along the way.

Listen, I know this!

I've become a different person in the last 10 years. I've lived this. For what it's worth, it's taken me a long time to get to just the stressed-out bitch who sometimes can't handle a shitty boss or un-fulfilling work. I used to be worse than the stress I've been sharing with you lately. (Sadly, it's true. Insert laugh here!)

I blamed myself for years for the things that happened to me from my past. I wanted to be mad at the world. Then I blamed myself for reacting from my humanity. I was mad that I was not perfect, that everything human in me, that needed to shut down, to shut off emotion, to get emotion, to be cared for, to care less, to get attention, to ignore attention, to want this, to not want that, to want control, to lose control, to care, to not care, to love, to hate, did what I’ve done, and will likely do.

I understand how we can hate who we are. I’ve always loved myself, but in the midst of that love there was hate. I have hated who I was. I have hated things I’ve done. I have hated ways I’d become. I have hated what I thought I could never be and who I thought I never had a chance to be. I have hated those who I thought made me hate me. I have hated me and others more because I didn’t know how not to hate.

I didn’t know about balance. I didn’t understand how to tap into the love for myself or for others. Then I forgave myself and I forgave others. Not over night. Not in a day. That forgiveness led me to more love and finding the love I always had but couldn’t reach, and I do not mean the kind of love we all feel is in our hearts, but the kind of love that is Love itself. The kind of love that is who we are. That is our Being.

What I am saying is that just as it took me years to learn some of the wrong lessons life presented, I, personally, needed years to un-think those lessons. I had to relearn and practice better lessons.

(Some learn quickly. Others do not. Whichever the speed, learning is a process, not a destination.)

I guess what I am trying to say to you, and trying to remind myself of (since I have recently let stress rule me instead of Love), is that becoming more conscious, loving our true Beings, it is a process. It is a practice.

It takes time and many reminders to accept and to live in Love. And, forgiveness, for others and for ourselves, like walking in Love, while both may be the most natural things in the world, they aren’t always the easiest to come by because we are human.

That’s the trick: to forgive ourselves along the way when we haven’t made it as far as we’d like to have come in Love. There is magic in letting go instead of hanging on, but if we can accept what is, accept imperfection in our humaneness, perhaps we might find more peace along life’s way.

And on it goes as we go. Yes?

We will live. We will fall. We will get up. We will sing. We will cry. We will dance. We will trip. We will laugh and cry some more. But we will learn. Then we will forget. Then we will learn again. Forget again. Then get some things and perhaps become more conscious.

Then we will die. Our true selves won’t parish. No. Our truth can never cease to exist as the source of us is our ultimate truth. But we will leave behind our human bodies as we continue to exist as divinity.

So what’s there to fear? It all is as it is.