Holiday-itis?

You know how they call someone a short-timer when someone is on their way out of a job? What do they say? You have short-timer's syndrome? So, what do they call it when you can't wait to go get your holiday started, can't wait to go to Colorado, can't wait to sit on your ass, eat a velveeta and white-flour tortilla quesadilla (a staple meal in Jen's house), watch movies, and laugh about what belly buttom jam smells like with one of your best friends?

We'll probably also make a list on which celebrity women are hot enough to have IBS (irritable bowl syndrome), and get away with crapping the bed during sex. Yes. I know. My conversations with Jen are the stuff of 12 year-old boys, dirt clods and farts, and are totally gross and immature. (Can you see why I can't wait?)

I am so already there in my head. I am sitting in Jen's sunlight-filled living room and we're plotting our evening plans. Or, we are at lunch, and we're both drinking a beer way too early in the day. But it doesn't matter, because it's the holidays and the chilli rellenos, drafts, and laughter are flowing. Maybe I'm sleeping in and I can hear the little foot steps of Jen's daughters coming down the hallway and tiny voices outside the door, whispering, wondering, if Aunt Levan is up and is going to come out and play.

I'm also already sitting down in the den, by a crackling fire dancing it's way inside of a stone-rock fireplace, and I'm yelling up to Jen, "Bring me more wine when you get another beer. And bring me my own bowl... You're not hogging all the cheesy popcorn this time, damn it!"

I don't know what book I am polishing off yet, because I'm packing light this year to avoid baggage fees, but Jen's got a title or two I'm pretty sure I'm going to want to get my hands on. I also don't even know what, exactly, we are doing for Christmas eve or Christmas day. But I don't care.

Holiday vacation, two weeks off, resting my eyes from fluorescent lights and computers, gaining back the stress pounds I lost, laughing until beer comes out of my nose, HERE I COME!